Over the weekend, I had two separate clients tell me that they were probably not going to reach their goals. They each had a slightly different situation, but they both believed that they couldn’t do what I laid out for them to do. It’s my job to set goals that I know are achievable for my clients, and that add up to long-term success and great results throughout the course of the program (you can see a bit more about my job and how I work with my clients in this video). Over the course of my health coaching programs, I work not only on my clients’ nutrition, but also on teaching them to feel empowered about their bodies, their minds, and themselves as valuable and unique people. (picture source)
In the case of these two clients, I am 100% sure they were and are capable of what I laid out, yet they still doubted themselves in the moment. They were creating obstacles and problems in their heads even before they started trying to reach their goals.
When I asked why, they each told me that they always get in their own way. One client had a history of self-sabotage whenever he started feeling like he was succeeding in his weight loss journey, and the other client tended to convince herself that she wouldn’t or couldn’t act in the best interest of her own health. (picture source)
By the end of the two sessions, my clients believed in themselves again and felt ready to achieve their weekly goals. The difference between someone who is standing in their own way and someone who feels empowered to act in favor of their own health is dramatic, and has a huge impact on that person’s quality of life.
So today, apply this lesson to your own life, and do something to empower yourself rather than standing in your own way. Think of one major goal that you’re working on, and how you can make it easier on yourself to achieve that goal rather than hindering your own progress. What recurring belief or behavioral pattern can you recognize that is stopping you or slowing you down? Why do you have that belief, and what can you do to change it? Make a list of all the reasons your goal is possible and the reasons you are capable of achieving it, and repeat these reasons to yourself regularly. I hope you feel empowered and ready to reach your goals! (picture source)
So tell me in the comments … What is one way you’ve stood in your own way or lacked self-belief? Are you standing in your own way right now? What can you do today to empower yourself instead?
Lately I’ve been struggling to find motivation to run. I run alone and lately I’ve been feeling very lonely. I love my CrossFit because I exercise with other ppl and it’s very motivating. I simply show up and we all work together. So I’ve been either contemplating changing up my running with more CrossFit or other classes, or pushing through and hoping my running funk is just a phase. Either way, this is a great post and a wonderful reminder of who exactly tends to stand in our way of accomplishing great things.
I’m so sorry you’re going through a slump, Bre. Personally, I really appreciate the alone time while running, but I understand how it would feel lonely when you’re used to group classes. Have you ever listened to podcasts (here are some of my favorites) or looked for a running buddy?
oh yes, standing in our own way, that is me at times! learning though
Not only are you learning for yourself, but you’re teaching others, me included! Keep it up!
Always such great posts Megan! I think my big limiting belief is something is going to be too hard or time consuming. I have a great idea for a documentary, but feel stuck on how to get started. It always seems “easier” just to forget about it. I have to find a way to get past that hurdle. But I also need to ask myself, how bad do I want it?
Oh wow, a documentary?!? That sounds so exciting, Tonya! I hope you go for it – just take small steps and it will add up to progress!
That 99 problems pic is cracking me up.
I’m the queen of getting in my own way. But I just love eating so much… so maybe I’m just following my won way. Much to my trainer’s dismay. LOL!
I saw you Instagrammed a 99 problems pic a few days after, and I chuckled. As for eating … I think loving it is a good thing 😉
Great quote choices!
Great post. Even as a fitness professional I still occasionally doubt my own fitness/health/wellness efforts. I get off track and tell myself I’ll never reach my goals. Then I’ll catch myself and remember, I’ve already come so far and that motivates me to stop being so hard on myself.
Good for you, Ali! I love taking a step back to realize how far I’ve come, and think it’s a great tool for all of us!
I get in my own way a lot I think we all do. Sometimes doubting your ability to do something before you even try sets you up to fail. I try to point this out to my kids. Easier said than done!
I would imagine this would be really hard to talk to kids about, Deborah, but I’m sure you’re doing great!
Very timely – I had a post today on tips to keep yourself going (https://txa1265.wordpress.com/2014/08/11/motivation-monday-21-tips-to-help-you-keep-going/), and conquering self-sabotage is one of them!
It has been said that people self-sabotage at things like weight loss often because they fear failing if they really try. Self-sabotage is a pervasive thing – so if you see it in their weight loss or exercise, chances are it is applied elsewhere … either the same way or as a reflection (i.e. it shows up as aggression). Either way it is a compensating action. And it can really destroy your chances of success.
Thanks for linking up your own post! Really interesting thoughts about self-sabotage. Sometimes I think of it as people actually being afraid that they will succeed instead of being afraid they will fail. It’s a complicated and (as you say) pervasive thing, but definitely something to recognize and deal with.